Oh! If you’d just stop telling yourself that you have to be everything that is tiring, heavy and boring for you…

Oh! wouldn’t it be sooooo nice if you could just embrace the beauty of the multiple facets of who you are!

 Today I feel sensitive.

Today I’m not confident.

Today I’m not big and strong.

It’s ok if I want to cry.  

It’s ok if I feel shy.

It’s ok if I feel small.

 It’s all ok because I can see myself FINALLY.

How many times have you said, “Don’t come out you dirty little spoiler!” you’re going to let everyone see that I’m not that big person that I invented myself to be.

How would it be if we could play together in the big world of big people and let our glistening, beautiful lovable adorable selves be seen?

Somewhere we learned it wasn’t safe.

 We get dressed with our big person clothes and paint on the right faces so that they will think we are really something special.

At least, we hope.

In reality, we’re really afraid that underneath they might see that we are something different from who they think we are.

Then we hurt our own selves by the mean things we tell ourselves.

What if you could hold yourself and know that it’s ok to be everything you are, and that underneath yourself you’ve got your own wise wizard who knows all the answers because the wizard feels it all?

How many times have we stepped on our little wizards and told him to shut up because he didn’t match what everybody else wanted to see?

How would it be if we could walk hand in hand with every part of who we are and let the multiple parts of ourselves be seen and embrace them?

Maybe we would stop being the things that we don’t believe in, and maybe we would start seeing things that make us feel happy inside.

What if we could ask someone to hold us or someone to help us when we’re not feeling strong?

What if it was ok to not be strong and to not be always brilliant, even if we think that’s what everyone else wants us to be?

Understanding the mask self.

The mask self is the outer layer of the personality, the self we superficially identify with, the face we show to the world. It is the self we think we ought to be, or wish we could be, based on idealized mental images. The pretense of the mask keeps us from the reality of all that we are, moment to moment.

All of us were physically wounded as children, we were imperfectly seen and loved. The mask is the self we constructed to hide the vulnerable, wounded child we once were. By putting a false self between other people and our inner vulnerability, we try to prevent ourselves from getting so close to others that we can again be hurt the way we were as children. It is our way to try to control life.

The undefended self

Susan Thesenga

What if you could

Put away those old tired masks that you’ve worn for way too many years.

Stop shutting up your sweet little wounded self that has been in hiding for too long.

Make fear your play buddy (but you always win in the end!)

Figure out what you really want because you can finally listen to your body talking to you.

Start doing the things that get you all lit up and jumping for joy.

Be your biggest cheerleader. (Whatever gender you are.)

And then… get people falling in love with your big wet puppy dog eyes that just need some tender care. (Or at least dare to ask for it)

And even let yourself be a stupid little, annoying, moody show off who does cartwheels in Walgreens because you feel like it.

And then you smile unapologetically and others wish they could be that free too...

How does that sound? Or what would your version of cartwheels in Walgreens be if you could let yourself play be?

What would you stop continually saying to yourself that just doesn’t help anything?

Well… I’ve come up with a course for you

PLAYTIME Free your inner child.

Start living a life that feels like play. Sing, dance, jump, act, say and do what feels alive for you without shutting your own self up all the time.

We are exploring the parts of ourselves that don’t get to come out to play very often.

We will get to draw, write, dance, move, laugh, share, scribble, yell, cry, play and co-create our way towards connecting to the playground of our inner child.

While: renegotiating the big person pressures we’ve built up in our lives and shed the masks,

By: learning to see yourself truly and listening to your body’s signals, while Awakening your inner wizard for guidance.

And: being kind to your whole self.

Which will: help you stop trying to be something you’re not!

Because: stifling your little self doesn’t help anyone.

You have a lot to share with world if you could only free your inner child and let yourself come out and play.

How we’ll do it:  (in squares)

•                       Say hello to your masks and personas.

Recognize the masks and personas you carry.

•                       Meet the little one.

Journey into your inner child space and meet who is inside.

•                       Put band aids on the owies

Visit the wounds that hurt and find resources for healing.

•                       Find out what’s in the big dark closet.

Look at what fears are hiding and are obstructing you.

•                       Be saved by your own super hero

Build your own persona that will help you through the difficult moments.

•                       Invite yourself to be silly

Allow yourself some fun freedom and let go of the auto censorship

•                       Stop being a meanie and give yourself buckets o’ luv

Replace the self-flagellation with a constructive supportive mindset.

•                       Dare to step out, and let yourself be seen.

Learn the power of vulnerability, how to share your feelings and how to dare to do what makes you feel happy.

What do you get from all of this?

·      You get to win yourself back.

·      You get to love who you are.

·      You get to stop hurting yourself by doing everything that someone else wants.

·      You get to start living a life that feels like playtime, you get to start laughing out loud, singing out loud, dancing, saying out loud and doing what feels alive for you without shutting your own self up all the time.

This is what some others who have taken the course have said:

You’ll get:

8 weekly live creative sessions where you’ll get to explore all the topics above with our playgroup.

8 weekly PLAYWORK games and experiences to try out in the REAL LIFE

1 Intergalactic session into the wisdom of the Akashic Records where you can ask anything you want. (AKA Carly is a channel, so we can connect to your higher soul for guidance)

2 Private play time sessions with Carly where we will create the best methods for you based on your inner child’s needs.  

BFF’s maybe..? You will get to have 1:1 deep, fun and real exchange with other play buddies in the course.

A whole group of play buddies who just want to play with your REAL self, through media, zoom, sharing and letting ourselves be seen and cared for.

And… as a present  Because I know you like presents…

You’ll get:

Look what I DID! A guidebook to turn your life into your playground.  

And:

25% off

Build your playground 6-month course.

Hello My name is Carly aka Captain Monkey Princess.

On the outside I am a beautiful model, actress, world traveler, multi-talented healer, somatic therapist, awesome mom, yoga teacher, builder, socialite, massage therapist and probably a lot more.

On the inside I have a little one that used to be beaten by her father, that used to believe she was worthless, that used to hate herself, that used to be so shy she couldn’t speak, and said terribly mean things to herself all the time.

The Carly that came from the little years did a ton of amazing things to try to become the big amazing Carly that she is now.

First she tried to get everyone else’s approval.

Then she tried to fix all the parts of herself that she didn’t like.

Then she tried to believe that they were long gone and buried.

She tried to become the image of perfection.

She always had tight shoulders and she often hurt her neck, because she carried the weight of the pressure of being perfect on her shoulders and was so rigid, she couldn’t relax her neck.

She dared to overcome a lot of fears, and luckily she learned to trust her higher guidance, which led her all over the world and in many scary adventures that she always managed to not only survive but to learn and grow from.

She did a lot of alternative therapy stuff, but when she did somatic movement therapy she discovered the incredible wizard inside. Her own body could tell her the truth when she listened!

But most of all, she had a huge sigh of relief when she discovered that she didn’t have to be the image that she had expected of herself.

She was allowed to be vulnerable.

She could even embrace her little wounded self and let her become a friend.

She also discovered that there are so many people, hiding their little selves behind their big people masks too.

When she stopped shutting up her little self, she developed the ability to feel and see other people, behind their masks, and to embrace and love the parts they hide.

Now Carly lets herself be traversed by multiple emotions in a day, she lets her body reveal secrets to her and she deeply trusts her higher wisdom even when she is super scared.

Carly lets herself sing out loud and dance in public. She goes up and talks to strangers even if she doesn’t know what to say. She knows that whatever life choice she feels called to do, even if she’s afraid (+ multiple other emotions), she can trust herself.

Now, she wants to help others. She feels pain when she sees others unhappy and carrying a big mask when she knows that underneath, that’s not who they are.

She loves it when people make huge life decisions because they follow their hearts.

She loves to help people see that they are loved by the universe and that all the parts they are hiding are ok.

She loves to creatively get people into their bodies, moving, writing, dancing, and speaking from their higher knowing.

She has relieved the heavy weight of needing to be perfect that feels so liberating that she wants to help YOU free the wild inner child in you and let yourself play.

Because.. what if life is really just a giant playground and our big goal is to dance, laugh, sing and play, while sharing the radiance of our own fragile, strong, vulnerable, powerful, beautiful selves?

Wouldn’t it be lovely if your life could be a playground where you let your little self play in all the different circumstances while feeling the joy and the effervescence of being alive because you are connected, vulnerable and open to feel everything?

Wouldn’t it be nice to stop hurting yourself and saying shut up to your little one?

You could hold them in your arms and rock them and as you hold yourself in your arms, you would say “it’s ok, you can be you because I am you and I love you and you are beautiful, in fact, you’re the most beautiful little one I’ve ever met in my entire life. “

And if you could believe that, what couldn’t you do?

Another testimonial: