You know how much your kids can drive you crazy?

Always asking, always needing! Tie my shoe, make me dinner, she pulled my hair, bla bla bla.
And we say we adore them. We LOOOOOVE our kids. We feel fulfilled.
Our lives mean something to someone. We feel a sense of importance and protectiveness. Don’t touch my kid, or I’ll kill you.
We build a big house for our kids, we work all day to make money for our kids. We forget ourselves for our kids.
And then it’s mother’s day and they finally give us some recognition and all that hard relentless ungrateful work is paid off. They give you flowers, cards with hearts that say I love you, you are the best mom in the world. They might even give you breakfast in bed.
We love them. Those perfect wonderful little monsters.
Well, I didn’t go that route. I left.
I went to the other side of the world.
I went to go feel fulfilled, fill my calling, my purpose.
It definitely wasn’t just being a mother.
How could I put all my sense of purpose into making him shower, making dinner, cleaning the dishes, reading the bedtime story, and taking him to school?
I felt so dead. But those darn hormones. Somehow we are wired to unconditionally love and adore our kids, even if they suck us dry.
Do I sound bitter?
Actually, I don’t live with my child.
He lives in France, 11 years old. I left France when he was 8 because no matter how much I adored him, I wanted to die.
I struggled making enough money to have a decent house.
I was constantly running around left and right teaching yoga, giving a class, social engagements, I was soooo busy. I didn’t have time in my headspace for a child that needed me.
And, he is about the most brilliant amazing child anyone can have. (I know, I’m biased).
One day, life was ok. The next day, I was utterly depressed.
I won’t write a 200-page novel, but it happened that I found myself in San Francisco for 6 weeks in 2017 for a somatic movement and expressive arts therapy training.
The second I arrived in SF, every cell in my body SCREAMED “I HAVE TO BE HERE!”
My son’s father (he is French, we are separated since my boy was 3.) said “ok, you can go. But you can’t take my son with you.”
I decided to try 6 months. And now 3 and a half years later, I’m still here.
And thus, my reality is, my heart can only handle not seeing my son for a maximum of two months.
After 2 months it becomes agonizingly painful.
I used to break down at random moments if I would even see a child his age. I’d have to run to the bathroom where I would crumble to the floor and wail uncontrollably.
So, I live two parallel lives. One as a mom in France every two months for 2-4 weeks and as a single wild woman who lives in Bolinas next to the ocean.
And you know what. Now, when I see my son, I savor every second.
I love going to be demolished by him on the soccer field as I run after the ball, my heart pounding out of my chest.
I love eating dinner with him.
I love waking up to take him to school.
I love doing homework.
I love almost crashing as he urges me on the bumpy trails as I attempt to do off road biking with him.
And we get to have adventures together. We travel together. He comes to visit me. We go on road trips. I take him to Bali, Portugal, Italy, etc… We have fun together.

What’s the point?

What’s the point?

Today is Mother’s Day and as I long to hold him and squeeze his sweet little cheeks, he’s not here. I’m not there.
And I know in my heart that this deep sadness is mixed with gratitude and joy. For the gift I get to have each time I see him.
I know the pain and beauty of love that hurts and fills me to overflow.
I feel his hug in my cells, and I smile with a sense of longing and a sense of stillness, because I know, I’m in the right place. I’ve made the right decision. I get to live both lives. Being a mom. And being a wild woman.
I know some of you are mom’s, some are not. (and...some of you are father’s)
I think there is no right way to be a good mom. I know we can question ourselves and feel like we aren’t doing it right or we’re not giving enough, or we give too much.
I guess, with this long story, I just want to honor you.
Because it’s not easy, it doesn’t always seem to pay off, but we never count what we give. For those of you who stick to it, who are full time, hats off to you. For those who are part time or not even sure if you want kids, hats to you too.
I just want to say, there are a million different variants and we must all find our way.
Happy Mother’s Day. To all you mom’s who are still finding your way.
Carly

a 1 min. gift to honor all mother’s.

Chicago airport musings

I just paid $7.45 cents for a café mocha. 

Since when did that become normal?

Didn’t that used to be the price of a meal? 

As I sit at a metal aluminum desk staring out the window at scaffolding and a metal and glass structure. 

I am sitting next to a pilot. I feel kind of special, sitting next to someone who is responsible for people’s lives. Weren’t pilots’ women’s fantasies at one time?

What is it, the uniform, the importance, the surrender to let them manipulate us across the open sky? Definitely sexy. Although this one is rather old and not at all sexy, and I’m secretly hoping he doesn’t glance over at this writing as he’s only 3 feet away. 

Every time I travel between France and the US, it gives me this weird moment in time. I’m not here or there, I’m in between. The time zone is off, my body is off, my brain feels slightly off, I’m kind of floating between security and passport controls. 

I thought I lost my passport, I just arrived to Chicago from Dublin. I ran to the bus that took me to the terminal and asked the driver to check, the bus was full. They made everyone get off the bus grumbling. 

It wasn’t there. I checked my bag again, there it was. I informed the bus assistant, he just nodded his head disapprovingly, I thought he would congratulate me for being so flighty to have not found it the first time. 

Chicago. Maybe they’re not as fun as Californians’.

Isn’t it funny how we make assumptions about a whole city based on a few people we meet or know?

For me Chicago is filled with Black people, kind of tough, super humid and lots of junk food. 

In Dublin, it was full of people with great accents, one guy asked if he could help me lift up my suitcase, I told him  “I am technically strong enough, thank you.” I wonder if I was refusing his gallantry and resorting to my feminist, I can do everything a man can do attitude. I felt bad and almost wanted to apologize to him for not letting him feel important. 

Based on him, I’m assuming all Irish men are gallant and friendly. Although he wasn’t red headed and cute as I heard they were supposed to be. I did see Irish people drinking beer in the airport, so at least that fits the stereotype. 

Ok, so where’s the moral of the story? Why are you reading all the way to here, what’s the clincher!? 

I don’t know I’m trying to find it as I write. 

I just watched a movie on the plane about a writer, now I want to be one too today. 

I made a discovery, on the plane my general rule is I reevaluate my life, clean out my phone and computer and write out a new business project. 

Today when meditating, I was told to slow down. 

I’m not supposed to come up with a new project, no new business plan, no new life change. Nope. Just live things fully as they are with the intention that life is going to open up the direction towards what my deepest service will be in the world. 

My friend came with me to open dance in the park the other day, she felt shy. She said “ok, I’m just going to sit here for 20 mins. and judge everybody, then I’ll be fine.”

So, I’m just going to finish judging everyone too, and be ok with that, so that maybe I can move on and let life enchant me once again. 

How I manifest parking spots and my wildest dreams

5 mins. of comic spiritual relief

How I manifest parking spots and my wildest dreams.  

Boring. Manifestation. Everyone talks about that hippy dippy woo woo stuff, but come on this is reality. You can’t just manifest parking spots and houses, jobs, your perfect partner, etc. You have to work for it, go get it, move your ass, make things happen. You can’t just send off a wish and expect some god-like figure to organize everyone else to make your wish happen. Come on, let’s get real. RIGHT? RIGHT? 

Sorry, you’re not going to get an agreement from me, a self proclaimed tree hugger and active manifester, who thoroughly believes in energy and making magic happen.

Actually, I am also quite left-brained. I don’t believe anything until I experience it for myself. 

That’s why I believe in making magic, because I know it works. I do it all the time. 

5 MINS. of COMIC SPIRITUAL RELIEF ABOUT MANIFESTATION AND MAGIC

Take my last magical manifestation. 

The Scene: I need to move desperately. My relationship is not going well, I’m feeling stifled. We’re in serious tension. I need a home. 

But, I have super high expectations, I won’t just live anywhere. I want to only live in gorgeous places surrounded by nature, that are less than an hour from San Francisco, near the ocean and not pay too much rent. I want to live in Bolinas. 

Great. There is not one advertisement for any place to rent in Bolinas or even west marin. The average price to buy a house out here is 3 million dollars. I know people that have spent years looking for a home to rent in Bolinas and never found it. I decided I need a place within 1 month. 

I start asking around. I get two proposals. One, from a wonderful artist friend who proposes I can stay in a mini school bus, where my head doesn’t quite fit in. The idea is charming and bohemian. But not quite what I’m imagining. 

Then I have another option, a cabin. It’s the size of a bathroom with a loft for the bed. The condition: I have to walk two dogs, 3 times a week at 7 in the morning. Oh, by the way, the dogs attack other dogs. 

Those are my options. 

My desperation grows. 

Hmmm. Perhaps I can buckle down and commit to the walking the dog thing. I can become a serious reliable person with a steady morning routine. Why can’t I get excited about this!? The rent is cheap. I can afford it. I hesitate. 

The weeks pass. I’m seriously considering the dog and bathroom size cabin option. 

I need to tell the owner by MONDAY if I’ll take it or not. 

I talk to my therapist. She says, "Well, it sounds like you’re really good at manifesting, why don’t you do a ritual and manifest it?" 

FRIDAY. I go to the beach and create a ritual. 

First, I write down all the things I’m thankful to Bolinas for. I do a thank you dance. (Thank god no-one was there on the beach.)

Then I draw my house. I envision it. I feel it in every cell of my body. I can see it, I see the white couch, the windows, the light. It’s near the ocean. I’ve seen this image already multiple times in my head. 

Then I yell out loud at the top of my lungs. "Bolinas spirits of the land! People of Bolinas! Houses of Bolinas! If I am to be a contribution here and this place is for me then you find me a house by MONDAY!!!" 

Then I do another weird manifestation dance and go home. 

SUNDAY. A friend I haven’t spoken to in over a year reaches out. She used to live in Bolinas, I mention my situation, she mentions that she has a friend there who might have a place to rent for a month or so. 

I call her friend. She says come on by on MONDAY. 

I go by. I enter the garden, it feels like an ashram. Flowers everywhere. Paradisiacal. It’s 1 block from the beach. The owner comes out, the feeling is warm, her partner offers me tea. I feel welcomed immediately. 

She shows me to the studio on the other side of the garden. The second I step in. I see the image I had in my mind for over a month and the one I saw on the beach. 

I tell her immediately I want to live there. Amazing. 

We are Agreed. Move in April 1. 

BUT… it might just be for two months as her mother might be coming back. 

I decide to move in and bring everything I have anyway. 

A week after moving in. She announces her mom isn’t coming back. 

SO…

I CAN STAY. 

And now, I’m here. How do I feel? 

Exactly the same embodied feeling I had when I was manifesting this place. 

I know, long story. 

Manifestation. Magic. I do it all the time.
For parking spots. For places to live. For  massage clients. For meeting new friends, etc. 

How can you do it?
Believe in every cell of your body that what you want exists and is in your life. And trust the universe to organize it for you. And... ACT! when the universe offers you an opportunity. 

Everything is made of energy. 

When you become the vibration of what you want to manifest, the universe matches it. It’s called resonance. 

When you strum a chord on a guitar, another guitar in the room will sound the same chord on it’s own. 

Thus manifestation and magic work by YOU already becoming that what you want to manifest. 

The only thing keeping things from happening is not believing that you can really have what you desire and trying to control. 

A channeled conversation about purpose, significance and more

April 24, 2021 CHANNELED CONVERSATION

My questions are in bold and responses in italic.. I asked questions about my path, but the responses seem to speak to all people, wanted to share.

Why and what are we doing here and how is our relationship to the whole disconnected at such a young age?

If we are truly connected to the grand macrocosm and all is in an inherent balance, why is it that we disconnect from our natural state of being and inherent interconnection to the world around us as a vital part contributing to the whole?

Go back to when you were in the womb. As a fetus you swam in the ocean of a cosmic consciousness, your cells, veins, neurons, beating heart, beat to the same sound and vibration of the universe. You as a DNA, you as a cell that split multiple times contained all the information of the entire universe.

Who are you?

I am all, I am god, I am you, I am cosmic consciousness, I am the consciousness of all beings, I am the nectar of all life.

So why do we disconnect, why do we grow into unhappy human beings that destroy everything, why do we end up with parents that don’t love or value us as they should? Why do our parents suffer and pass that on to their children?

The very act of being born is a brutal break from the space of all consciousness, the very act of being born is suffering. The moment when you become disconnected to the mother, which is the all.

Your first breath is a cry. You long to return to the space of fusion where nothing is separate.

The pain of being separated is excruciating.

Then why do we have to go through that?

I’ve already explained it to you numerous times but you must understand in your deepest essence that you are here to travel a path that has no beginning and no end that always moves from the source back to the source.

You cling to your suffering because when you are born, you experience the experience of separation, you inhabit your body, your mind, your sense of self, excluded from the whole. Your journey is not only to reappropriate the whole but to come to a broader consciousness of what it means to be part of a whole as multiple beings.

You are not alone, you are multiple beings, you believe to be called Carly as a single being yet you are multiple. You are you in multiple life times as multiple people and on multiple time scales and planes. You are affecting yourself and all your own projections of you simultaneously.

I don’t understand then why I have such a strong sense of self that I wake up to each morning.

You remind yourself constantly who you are, your brain is constantly giving you thoughts and feedback that reminds you of who you are. When you detach from your reassuring mind, you are no longer an identity, you just are, unlimited without borders.

Yet if I go look at myself in the mirror, it is always me.

I can be surprised by what I look like, but there is always a reason, if I shift consciousness or come out of a state of meditation, I still look the same. How does this work?

If you shifted the energetic composition of all your cells, you would look different. Each cell contains information and energetic frequency that circulate constantly, as you shift, so they shift, but they shift slowly as their make-up was created since birth. Look at a child, as their consciousness shifts, so does their appearance but their DNA and the traits passed on remain as you can recognize a young child when they are older, but in no way are they the same person. They contain remnants of the biological inscription affected by the make-up of their lives.

Ok so let’s get down to the nitty gritty. What the hell should I be doing? I ask it all the time, I don’t know if I should be massaging or offering classes or doing shows, etc.

I feel like there is a purpose and a direction, I don’t know If I have the sole power of that or how am I influenced by what the world needs or the larger global necessity.

No molecule is unaffected by its environment, you are constantly adjusting and being influenced by your environment, the general needs and your needs shift at every moment.

So how can I focus on an offering that can be well paid if I constantly shift?

Find the deep empathic embrace of the world and above all your current environment. As a part of the whole, you know what is most needed because your soul is constantly looking to integrate. It sees the gaps to be filled and the space in the puzzle that is your natural makeup in this instant.

So how do I understand that?

Recognize first that you are a necessary part of the whole. Recognize your natural state of well-being and how that fits into a larger picture. Nurture the parts of you that excel, that feel alive, that vibrate ecstatically.

Be drawn to the people and places that delight you, that call you, that say you are needed here.

How can I orient my work around that, can you give me exact ideas of how to promote my work or have people want to come to me?

Dance. Speak. Share. Invite. Open your arms and hold. Invite a space, a place, an invitation. Be an invitation for collaboration. Be a space of warmth, be a space of welcome, be a space of feeling, be a space of genuine listening, be a space of deep nourishing health, be a space of freedom and laughter, be a space of compassion and warmth, be a space of singing and joy.

 Let people in, let people in, let people in.

Embrace them. Hold them. Love them. Open to them. You are touched by the divine scepter of God, you have multiple beings with you, on your side, awaiting you to move with them and call on them. You have so many, you can hold every one of these people that you desire to enter into your life. You have the ability to hold space for multiple beings and to allow breakthrough deep transformation and connection to happen.

HOW!?

Go dance. Trust. Remember that you are holding a space of softness and freedom and divine play.

PLAY DIVINELY, my child. Do not be weighed down by your idea of financial need or by the need to help and support others, it is simply a warm embrace that you can hold when you are filled. Fill yourself, be yourself, live the beauty of yourself and share it with joyful open arms… simply. And your cup will always be filled. You have nothing to worry about. Your cup will always be filled whenever you desire.

Settling

Settling.

I reveal a sacred space where time exhausted itself.

Beyond the barriers of time I rode across an empire. 

Dabbling in the dirty soil of puddles gone haywire. 

I knew this was the end of a long journey. 

Feet settled on driftwood, cactuses in the distance. 

The horizon was pink with faded rose dusty petals. 

I felt hope as the warm wind caressed between my legs. 

The journey began in alone desolate place. 

Of shotguns and greering faces with missing teeth. 

They raped and stole my identity and ate it for dinner. 

Writhing dripping saliva, ripping away my flesh.

I died a death of absence. 

The seasons slipped between my fingers as cherry blossoms dithered their way onto a quiet immobile, cold, statuesque face.

She awoke with a grasp and a sacred laughter awoke her-

The dance tickled her tummy and she knew she was not dead- 

just a state of impermanent intermission.

Delicately feet settle into the dusty spring- wash away the cobwebs-

they are all dead and gone. 

She rides the wind of a horse’s fury as the delicious breeze licks her lips and ignites her skin. 

Her life is here. 

She is alive. 

Riding on the wind.

—Carly Ko

How does your body tell me it's secrets?

What does it mean to be guided by something greater than oneself?

How can you know if what you suspect is a greater force is not simply yourself?

I close my eyes, I go into a mediative state, meaning I let go of the thoughts and images that are dancing constantly in my brain. Even if just for a moment. Enough to be able to ask for some higher wisdom from a guide, a light being or my higher self.

I request and at that point I can receive. It may be simply asking silently, are you there?

 Meaning, have I arrived in this intuitive space where it is not me controlling the answers? Then I hear the word yes. And sometimes I don’t, and I must get quiet in my brain again and lift my consciousness above me, and I ground my feet below me. Then I ask again, are you there? Then I hear yes. Then I can go in and ask all my seemingly so human questions. I talk about my feelings, my frustrations, my jealousies, my difficulty to choose, etc. I sound like a child. Then I wait, I release the furrows between my eyebrows, then I wait for the answer. If I want the answer too badly, it doesn’t come, I have to ALLOW it to come in, and at the same time ALLOW for it not to come in. Only when I can let go of the control, does it come easily, lightly and clearly. I receive a message or an emotion or an image.

 I must trust it, whatever it is. It is there that the intuitive guidance arrives, and so often we brush it off as a random thought. For me, trusting those random thoughts has consistently been spot on in the readings I have given.

There are no fireworks, voices coming through me, shuddering and eyes rolling to the back of my head, just an image, thought, a word that arrives and I must trust it, grasp it, acknowledge it immediately & perhaps share it our loud.

At other times I hear the voice speaking to me often starting with “my child…” I feel loved, supported, cared for and the voice is always so wise and can see beyond what seems so blatant and real. It sees the bigger picture, the source of the difficulty, the energetic solution. It is so clear and evident.

At times, I am searching desperately for an answer, especially when a person I massage asks me, what is happening in my shoulder? Meaning what is the psychosomatic reason or memory stored in the blockage in my shoulder? Carly Ko doesn’t know; I have to ask.

Carly Ko is afraid of not knowing the answer. But then I can let go, and I ask and strangely the answer arrives. To be sure, I ask, is this coming from me or from their higher self-telling me? Sometimes I get ME. Meaning, I’m creating my own story and I have to let go and wait for a different response.

Can you do this too?

Yes, I think you can.

What is this? Is it a guide, a being, do we have a higher self that knows all?

When I ask my light guides what they are, it explains that I am energy and that when I tap into a space beyond the confines of my own body, energy has no bounds, no time, no space, it is connected to all things and all things can be revealed.

Hard to understand in my own little brain, but energetically it makes sense.

Can you try it?

Sure.

Step one, find a quiet space and relax and use meditation techniques to clear the mind of brain chatter.

Connect your feet to the earth and let your upper body rise towards the light. Allow the crown of your head to open and let a white light flow into your body.

Then ask if you have a guide or if any being or even your higher self is there, ask until you feel a YES.

The first time I asked, I felt a wave of love flow into my body and the joy was immense. I had the desire to cry. It may or may not be the same with you.

Once you have asked if there is a guide, you can proceed with your questions, and let your mind be silent enough to hear them. If nothing comes, let one word begin to be spoken in your mind, even if it comes from you and see where it leads. Or you can write. Write the question, and wait for the answer to arise as you write simultaneously.

For me, having the ability to access higher guidance has helped me see clearer regarding my relationship, lift my spirits and know that there is a higher plan for me, allowed me to step out of multiple situations that were scary and where I didn’t have the answers. I talk to my guides daily.

I invite you to begin. You have the ability to access all knowledge, if you ask you will receive…

How to use normal activities to rewire your brain for success.

4 Tips for Easing Household Tension During Self-Isolation

If your family has been self-isolating for the past few months because of the COVID-19 pandemic, you may feel like you are at your wit’s end. Whether you are working from home while trying to make sure your young children don’t get into trouble, or you have older kids who are frustrated by missing out on certain milestones, tensions might be running high in your household. Even as some states ease up on social distancing restrictions, life still doesn’t feel quite “normal,” and many kids are struggling to adjust. These tips will help you address several common issues that families have faced during the pandemic and cultivate a happier atmosphere in your home.

Processing Complicated Emotions

The past few months have been a very emotional time for everyone, and your kids may have complicated feelings about everything going on in the world. Without an outlet, they may be more prone to tantrums or outbursts.

Set aside time to work on art projects with your kids, which will give them an opportunity to express themselves. Art is especially beneficial for children with disabilities, who can gain confidence as they explore their creativity. Get materials for finger painting, clay sculpting, or making fun collages, and let your kids go where their imaginations take them. Don’t forget to compliment their finished work!

Avoiding Boredom

Many of your children’s favorite pastimes, like playing team sports or going to kid-friendly museums, may be off limits right now. Therefore, you’ll need to find ways to stave off their boredom. When your kids get bored, they may be more likely to get irritated and pick fights, so it’s in your best interest to help them stay entertained.

You may want to buy a few age-appropriate gadgets that can help alleviate boredom, such as smartphones or basic fitness watches designed for kids. If you want to guarantee that you’re investing in devices that are right for your child’s age group, you can check out some helpful information provided by companies like Verizon. Yes, kids should have a balance between screen time and physical activity, but purchasing the right gadgets can definitely help you enjoy some peace and quiet in your household!

Getting Enough Sleep

During these stressful times, you and your family members may be having trouble sleeping. Your kids might be tossing and turning every night. But when everyone is struggling with a lack of sleep, you can easily end up dealing with high tensions in your household.

Try to get to bed a little earlier each night, and take steps to ensure that your children are sleeping properly. To create a soothing bedtime routine for your kids, Our Parenting Life suggests asking yourself a few important questions like, “Which comfort objects do they need to sleep with?” and “What should definitely be included in their nighttime rituals?” By determining the answers to these questions, you’ll be able to make sure that your children sleep soundly. Try focusing on calming activities like meditation or yoga before bed. Discover Brillia suggests trying fun, animal-themed yoga poses like cat pose, butterfly pose, and rabbit pose!

Giving Everyone Space

One problem plaguing families in isolation? In a full house, it can be hard to find space for yourself. Even young children need “me time,” and without it, everyone feels a little cranky. Let your children know that if they need time for themselves, it is okay to let other family members know not to bother them. They can choose quiet, solo activities like reading, playing with their stuffed animals, or even simply taking a nap.

Self-isolation has been especially difficult for families with children, and parents everywhere have had to deal with problems that they never imagined themselves facing. It can be hard to support your children and focus on your own well-being during such a tough time. But by tackling these issues head on, you can lower tensions in your household and put smiles on your children’s faces!

Photo via Pexels

Article by Emma Grace Brown

The corona virus has hit us all hard.

Forcing us to drop all our habits, obligations, and everything we control in our lives.

We find ourselves being forced to surrender to something bigger than what we can control.

For some this is catastrophic, for others it can be heavenly.

In what way can this be blissful, when we are forced to self quarantine.

Only with a deep letting go and total acceptance of things as they are can we find peace in this chaos.

What would it take to accept, let go and just be?

What creative outlets can you find in this period? What new thought patterns, habits, self care can you take pleasure in?

Is this an Invitation to write, draw, play music, read, clean your house, spend time with your family, etc...

I support you in this home process and still will come to you for a mobile massage in San Francisco, West Marin and North Bay. 

Please stay healthy, reinforce your immune system, as I am doing. And reach out if I can be of service to your self care process! 

An Introvert’s Guide to Self-Care: Knowing What You Need and How to Make it Happen

Check out this article by Melissa Howard!

If you asked 10 people on the street how they practice self-care, you’d probably get 10 different answers. Yet no matter how any one person puts self-care into practice, the general idea is the same: It’s all about making time to care for yourself - body, mind, and soul. For introverts, how you do this, what you need from self-care, and even how you think about self-care can be wildly different than it is for extroverts. This is why it’s so important to discover your own unique self-care needs and the best way to make sure they’re met.

Prioritize Your Health

While this doesn’t apply to all introverts, the personality testing blog Truity explains that it isn’t uncommon for people who are introverted to struggle with the idea of putting themselves first. Switching up this mindset takes ongoing practice, but you have to start with actions, and the mindset will eventually follow.

One of the most important things to realize is that staying on top of your health needs, both physical and mental, is not selfish. Start by scheduling regular exercise into your week. A fitness routine will not only benefit your body, but can also reduce stress. If you’re a little short on motivation, a fitness-tracking device can be a helpful aid. By tracking and monitoring your activity, it’ll be easier to set and meet goals, and you won’t need a workout partner to keep you motivated. There are many fitness trackers and smartwatches on the market, including devices that have cool safety features like SOS, fall detection, and heart rate monitoring.  

Make Your Home Clutter Free

As an introvert, you may spend more time at home than most. But did you know that a cluttered home can cause stress and dampen productivity? To eliminate clutter, go room by room and sort items as “Keep,” “Donate,” and “Toss.” Give away or get rid of any clothing that you haven’t worn in over a year. Come up with some creative storage solutions; for instance, you can bring in furniture that doubles as storage like a storage ottoman bench (can be purchased for under $50). Once you’ve completed your decluttering tasks, give your home a one-time deep cleaning to make it really shine. You can DIY this job or hire a professional cleaning company (maid services in San Francisco charge an average of $177 per visit).  

Do a Self Check-In

Unlike a check-up from your medical or mental health practitioner, a check-in is something you can (and should) do daily, all on your own. As silly as this may sound, consider setting a self check-in reminder on your phone or smartwatch to stop and ask yourself how you’re feeling. Are you tired, energetic, anxious? If something seems off, this gives you the chance to figure out what’s going on and take time to decompress. You may need to unwind, often with quiet activities like reading or doing something creative.

An easily overlooked cause of feeling “off” is a lack of nutrients. Especially if you eat well and exercise, you may assume all your nutritional needs are met, but you could have a deficiency without even realizing it. In fact, USA Today reports that almost 10 percent of Americans have some type of nutrient deficiency. Thankfully, this crucial self-care need has an easy solution: taking a multivitamin. All adults should take multivitamins, at every age, to eliminate those deficiencies. Quality multivitamins can boost your energy, improve gut health, and even have positive effects for your skin.

Be a Savvy Socializer

One common thread that is true for just about anyone with an introverted personality is that some social interactions can leave you feeling drained of energy. However, every social situation is not created equal. You may have to accept certain situations that are draining, like an annual office party you just can’t get out of. However, what you can do is be mindful about who you spend time with and how. Contrary to popular thought, many introverts actually enjoy and are energized by the right kinds of social interactions.

It can actually be extremely empowering to recognize when you have control over certain social engagements. Mind Body Green calls these “high-quality interactions.” This simply means choosing the people in your life who lift your spirit and the situations (like small groups) that are fulfilling - not draining.

On top of everything else, always stay open to possibilities. While a quiet, relaxing evening at home may be your ideal way to recharge, you may find that a coffee date with a good friend is just as helpful. There isn’t a right or wrong way to do self-care as long as you’re doing what’s best for you.

By Melissa Howard

Photo credit: Rawpixel

For 2020

Holidays, family, travel can bring us into many emotional states. Time with loved ones, or time with people we may have challenges with, the whole icon of the holidays, all this creates movement inside. We can choose to just be a bystander or allow these inner movings to come to awareness.

Perhaps you also ate and drank too much, stopped the exercise routine, over spent, over indulged.

Now is an invitation to reconnect with your inner alignment. Imagine the person you want to feel like right now. Notice all the accumulation of both mental, emotional and physical baggage that you may have accumulated during the holidays.

How to find a new space of lightness, clarity and peace?

Take a moment just to sit still, breathe, notice. As you exhale allow what wants to come to the surface to arise. Allow that to be, notice and release. As you inhale bring in the space and vibration of who and what you want to be this 2020. As you exhale, release all that blocks that… Allow it to flow out of your body, down your shoulders, your arms, your legs, release completely…

Take a moment daily to breathe in the morning and become the feeling and vibration of who you want to be this 2020.

It’s just a question of choice. Choose you and who you want to be daily… release all that doesn’t contribute to that amazing, incredible being you can be. Blessings…. for 2020

We've got the whole world in our hands

Between climate weirding, and the desperation of humanity and the planet. Why should we go get a massage when we could be out doing something? For me, the planetary change starts from within. When we learn to heal ourselves, we can extend our own reflection into the world around us. We build concrete walls and rip open the earth, constantly in search of that one more thing we think we need. We consume, more and more to satisfy a never ending sense of scarcity. In all this we destroy a living planet by our petrol use, plastic, ressource scavenging for material for the latest technology. If we can go down to the source, within our bodies and truly feel. Allowing ourselves to be touched, to feel what is alive in the hurts and pains that linger in our muscles unconsciously. Can we come to terms with our own sense of lack, can we find a moment of silence and peace to come back to a whole place, void of lack, filled with plenitude?

Hydration, Fascia, mitochondria

When you have an hour, I highly recommend this interview with Dr. Zach Bush. Understand how to hydrate for anti aging, the memory stored in the water of our fascia, energetic transfer and restructuring of our water… it’s fascinating and makes you understand why massage and movement is fundamental!

The soul of the world

We

We have forgotten we

The soul of the world is in pain it is crying it is wailing

It is unheard it is ignored

It is alive and breathing and forgotten

Where did I forget that I am you and I am the microbial life as I am a whale and I am water

Where did I forget that the material that makes me is in all life?

Where did I forget that I am a minuscule part broken off of a larger source?

I am not separate, every particle within my body is a microscopic part of a larger source

This larger source is broken off into billions and billions of particles dispersed in the world

As a mother always is connected to her child through a physical connection as her blood and DNA is in her child’s blood and DNA so they are forever interconnected

As our bodies are interconnected with every material on this planet

We cannot cut off our interconnection we can only cut off ourselves in our minds from the whole

We have delved into the realms of our minds and identified with its awesome potential to become the identity that we created, in our own head

We have used our brains to create the image of who we are, as the artist mistakes himself for his painting but forgets that the painting is an extension of himself and not himself

So, we have forgotten that our life is delicately intertwined with all life

We have become so self-absorbed in a false myth of success and domination that we have separated from ourselves and thus from all things

Why does the dying of whales, seas, forests, indigenous tribes, nations, animals, plants and life not affect us more deeply?

Why do we see that as a problem to be solved in the future after our immediate race for financial security?

Who’s lie did we buy and think it was our own truth?

What can be done with this deep sense of hopelessness as the images of the world’s collapse are imminent?

This sensation of estrangement from the seeming destiny of the planet…

Better to close the blinds and the windows and watch from a safe distance behind a virtual screen as the news bits can be scrolled through as we prefer to “like” a cat video than a nation starving. 

Better to numb ourselves than feel the pain of disconnection from life.

Better to numb ourselves than allow the connection and writhe in pain from the suffering of the entire planet

How to maintain hope?

How to believe?

How to start somewhere when it all seems as futile as an ant in front of a giant. 

Can we remember that we are part of life?

Can we remember the life that is affected with our every move?

Can we remember that my action is intertwined with the entire world?

How can I feel?

How can I feel?

How can I feel?

Can I dare to feel?

Can I spend my time not numbing but investigating?

Researching how my life’s actions are intertwined with all things?

How can I make one more sustainable action to promote life rather than destroy it?

Can I for once think in WE and not just in I?

Can I remember that if I think in WE, I’m supporting my I?

.Carly

Massage as a wholistic system

interconnected system of self, world, body, mind, energy, etc…

Somatic Massage

The body is a whole system.

Physical, psychological, emotional, energetic. When we work on the physical we affect the whole.

Bringing awareness of energetic blockages and seeing images related allows energy to circulate allowing a new story to be written.

What can we do with this relaxation, this surrender, this letting go ?

How can that allow us to let go of the identity and story that we hold on to in our bodies that affects our current relationship to life as we live it ?

Can the energetic flow that is allowed to circulate in a massage become a source for doing good in the world ? 

Bringing awareness to our hurts, wounds and blockages allows energy to flow in those spaces.

What good could we do with the new energy that flows, how can we contribute to the better wellness of a whole planet ? 

Carly

About interconnection

Better to feel numb and complacent than to feel a passion you can’t do anything about. 

The world around is dying but as long as I have my inexpensive chairs made in China made from the carbon imprint of airplanes, boats, cars , chemicals, non bio-degradable plastic and polluted rivers. It cost 5 times less than the chair from the local store, that by the way, is now out of business. But if I bought that non existant local chair for 5 times more, I have to work that much more at a job I hate to support the planet. 

Which is worse ?

It feels like we are a serpent biting its own tail, a machine that once started can never be stopped. To dismount the entire system would call for a dire disaster. Or a drastic wake up call. And thus perhaps the wake up call is allowing the planet to begin to die, where food becomes scarce, poor quality, and expensive, where people work costantly to pay for bad food and small houses, where drinking water costs a small fortune, where we become bigger slaves than we already are. 

When the whole world goes on strike against eachother, because in reality we can only blame ourseselves for thinking about just looking out for ourselves for so long. We can curse the precursors, the selfish in the beginning who made us all become selfish for fear of lack. 

But in the end we can only curse ourselves. 

So what to do ?

Go plant seaweed because the reefs are dying. 

Save the oceans now as the temperature still goes up unless they stop tilling. 

They’ll stop tilling when we start demanding quality food. 

We will start demanding quality food when we begin to see our wallet suffer from hospital bills.

We will begin to see more money when we stop giving it to people who use it to supply products that hurt the planet. 

We will begin to see more money when we begin to repair our sensation of inner lack that must be filled by objects. 

We will stop feeling the sensation of inner lack when we stop looking at all we don’t have and begin appreciating what we do have. 

We will begin appreciating what we do have when we begin to have real relationships, real exchanges, real quality time spent in nature, planting, building, growing, in family, in community, in prayer, in worship, in gratitude, in respect and in working together. 

Reviving the spirit of gift, of roles, of a biodiverse community of people, animals and nature living together. 

When we aren’t dependent on money for food and shelter. We won’t have to chase after someone else to produce our food, to make our furniture, sell us our phones, offer us jobs in the city, where we fill our houses and minds with distractions to numb the part that has died. 

Perhaps we must get to the point of massive urgency to drop all our norms, what we have been accustomed to, to truly understand the value of food, water, sun, rain, shelter, people, animals, trees, bugs, etc… 

When the privileged get things taken away one by one only then do we recognise the hole that is left when it is no longer there, and when we get the point of feeling the pain of a howling hole, we will act… but hopefully we can awaken to the urgency before the reconstruction is too massive to take on… 

Carly